New Vogue Sewing Patterns: Winter 2015

5 Oct

If you haven’t heard, Vogue Patterns just released a new collection of sewing patterns a few days ago. I haven’t had a chance to really sit down and take a look at them as I’ve been out of town the last week (where I had a wonderful time teaching in Portland, Maine, and hanging out in Boston with Jenny. Couldn’t have asked for a better week! Hope to post more about it later πŸ™‚ ), but man, this was a nice welcome back. Ha.

Surprisingly (or not, depending on your stance with Vogue), most of the patterns in this collection are relatively tame (and a few are even sorta tasty). I’m a firm believer that winter clothes are far superior to summer clothes (layers and cozy wools and tights and scarves and don’t even get me started on sparkly holiday dresses, wheee!), which may have something to do with my opinion on the new pieces.

V1475
Vogue 1475 // Badgley Mischka
Like this shiny piece of opulence. Ain’t no place in my life for a sparkly evening gown, but man, I really like this. I even like the fabric – I think it works really well with the style of the dress.

V1474
Vogue 1474 // Tom and Linda Platt
Or how about a bias floor-length gown made in a yummy silk charmeuse? Yes, please!

V9145
Vogue 9145 // Claire Shaeffer
YOU CAN JUST GET ON MY BODY ASAP.

V1468
Vogue 1468 // Nicola Finetti
Obviously there’s nothing particularly ground-breaking about this design (and I’m starting to get sick of the exposed metal zipper trend on EVERYTHING, sorry not sorry), but I like all the options for colorblocking and using different textured fabrics. Also, do I spy a new designer in the line-up?? YAY.

V1477
Vogue 1477 // Sandra Betzina
Love knit tops with interesting neckline detail like this.

V1479
Vogue 1479 // Isaac Mizrahi
I know these oversized coats are supposed to be really trendy right now, but they’re just a little too 80s-Power-Career-Woman-With-Strong-Shoulders to me.

V9160
Vogue 9160
“Excuse me! My eyes are up here!”

V1469
Vogue 1469 // Lia Lia
Even the skinniest model wearing the prettiest dress can’t escape a bad piping placement.

V1471
Vogue 1471 // Nicola Finetti
Really beautiful dress, but it should have been worn by a model with similar proportions. The waistline is way too high, yeesh. And if I’m way off my rocker and that’s the way the dress is supposed to look… double yeesh.

V9149
Vogue 9149
“We need to figure out a way to re-release this pattern but make it seem new.”
“What if we add a tail?”
“Say no more.”

Those were pretty tame. However, Vogue wouldn’t be Vogue without a little random fuckery thrown in.

V9159
Vgoue 9159
“You promised when making these pieces that you’d never wear the two of them together. The lie detector test determined that was a lie.”

V9153
Vogue 9153 // Marcy Tilton
I swear to god, every Marcy Tilton pattern is starting to look the exact same.

V9156
Vogue 9156
I totally had a pair of purple fuzzy zebra print pants when I was in high school. I guess this answers what ended up happening to them.

V9162
Vogue 9162 // Kathryn Brenne
I guess buttflaps are also making a comeback this year.

V9163
Vogue 9163
“Bitch, be cool.”

V1478
Vogue 1478 // Sandra Betzina
“Well, at least I wouldn’t skin a collie to make my backpack.”

V9164
Vogue 9164 // Kathryn Brenne
“I wish this was a hamburger instead.”

V1473
Vogue 1473 // Bellville Sassoon
Bellville Sassoon gives you wiiiiiiiings!

V9165
Vogue 9165 // Mary Jo Hiney Designs
This has to be the weirdest accessory pattern Vogue has ever released. Custom decorative boxes – complete with a notions list that rivals the entire stock of your local Joann’s. Also, the 9 year old me in is amused that the designer’s name is “hiney.” That is all.

And SPEAKING OF FUCKERY – I saved the very best for last!

V1472
Vogue 1472 // Zandra Rhodes
Every single thing about this outfit is insane. I couldn’t tell if that was a skirt or really low-crotch harem pants, until I looked at the line drawing – and was delighted to also discover that the look includes suspenders (to keep the skirt up, I imagine. That thing looks heavy af). And in case you don’t feel sexy when wearing an entire bolt of fabric, there’s a lovely midriff cut-out – the perfect space to allow for a little post-holiday-dinner belly expansion.

What did you think about the new Vogue collection? Anything gorgeous that needs to be a part of your wardrobe? Any random fuckery that makes you want to tear your eyes out? How do you like them new designers? Ahh, Vogue, it’s like you’re giving me Christmas 4x a year. I loves you.

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68 Responses to “New Vogue Sewing Patterns: Winter 2015”

  1. Janet Rowland October 5, 2015 at 7:00 am #

    Thank you for making me laugh out loud! Only Vogue can produce patterns that are so insanely impractical and pose them with such sincerity!!

  2. kim maclean October 5, 2015 at 7:18 am #

    I wonder if they ever even sell any of those patterns. Presumably they know it’s 2015 right?!

    • LLADYBIRD October 9, 2015 at 8:07 am #

      Oh, they sell the hell out of them. ESPECIALLY the Marcy Tilton ones, ha! πŸ™‚

  3. jne4sl October 5, 2015 at 7:20 am #

    I’m bummed, I think there’s less to buy here than any collection yet. I’m starting to see potential in 9145 but not in ref-stripe, yikes.

    • LLADYBIRD October 9, 2015 at 8:08 am #

      I guess I’m the only one who likes the red-stripe. What can I say – I played a lot of soccer as a kid πŸ˜‰

  4. Memisaacs October 5, 2015 at 7:23 am #

    Relatively polite this time ladybird . That trip must have soothed you ! I have to agree with a lot of your very acutel observations though😜

    • LLADYBIRD October 9, 2015 at 8:08 am #

      It’s hard to be super snarky when there’s not a lot of shitty material to work with πŸ™‚ hahaha

  5. Megan Parkinson October 5, 2015 at 7:38 am #

    I love reading your comments on Vogue pattern releases! And I agree with you on most of these.

    However, the first thing I noticed about 1468, which I just can’t get out of my head now, is the fabric choice was a little unfortunate, making it look like she should have changed her tampax maybe a few hours earlier! Sorry if that’s a little crude!

    And 1469 could have been so nice, but how could they get the piping placement so wrong! It makes the model look misshapen and I am worrying about chafing on certain delicate areas . . .

    • racurac2 October 5, 2015 at 8:47 am #

      hahahahahahahahahahah!

    • Fliss October 5, 2015 at 9:20 am #

      Haaaaa i was looking at 1468’s radioactive armpit. Double whammy!

    • Dani Malloy October 5, 2015 at 9:20 am #

      Oh god, can’t unsee. Hahaha

    • Angela October 5, 2015 at 10:08 am #

      How could Vogue have NOT seen that!! Shall we send them boxes of Tampax?

    • liz-o-matic October 5, 2015 at 11:42 am #

      You Madame win the comments section! Congratulations- you may collect your prize at the exit πŸ˜‰

    • Becky Thompson October 6, 2015 at 5:11 am #

      I totally missed that on my first pass. Now it’s stuck in my head! Very unfortunate floral pattern placement. And nip chafing? (snicker)

    • LLADYBIRD October 9, 2015 at 8:09 am #

      LOLOLOL I DIDN’T EVEN NOTICE THE TAMPAX MISHAP. TOO GOOD (and definitely not too crude for this blog! :P)

  6. Jennifer October 5, 2015 at 7:52 am #

    So reading the first few reviews – I’m like ok, yeah. Then reading the last few – I’m trying to control myself from guffawing (is that a word?) All over my keyboard. Then I blew it on the last review omg. Lmao.

  7. hashigal October 5, 2015 at 8:07 am #

    HAhahahahaha. I fucking love your reviews of pattern releases! Even when I completely disagree with them (“Make-It-Look-Cool, Bitch, Challenge” pending).

  8. Tracy October 5, 2015 at 8:09 am #

    Do not understand V1472. Couldn’t stop staring at it. And then looking at the line drawings. And then looking at the photo again. What the…?

    (That said, I’m sure someone will find a way to avant-garde it up and make it nifty, but until then: Do. Not. Understand.)

  9. Jenny Cashmerette October 5, 2015 at 9:33 am #

    Weirdly, if you look at the tech drawing for Vogue 9163 it’s actually quite nice – very close to the Grainline Cascade duffel! But you’d never know it in the two tone flannel they have going on there…

  10. Molly Lindell October 5, 2015 at 10:07 am #

    “random fuckery”–too funny. Always love your comments on Vogue patterns.

  11. Anonymous October 5, 2015 at 10:11 am #

    HaHaHaHa The Emperor has no clothes- alas someone calls out the insanity. That be said I do like Vogue 9163

  12. Sigrid October 5, 2015 at 10:12 am #

    Oh my god, that last one. THAT LAST ONE.

  13. jay October 5, 2015 at 10:32 am #

    I feel they are throwing out a challenge with the last one. Let’s see if anyone can do anything with this……

  14. Megan Parkinson October 5, 2015 at 10:52 am #

    Ha ha! Should have known my comment wasn’t too crude for readers of THIS blog! πŸ˜‰

  15. carly927 October 5, 2015 at 11:15 am #

    1473 makes no sense as a winter pattern when it’s clearly a beach cover-up.

  16. Pam October 5, 2015 at 12:18 pm #

    OMG!!! I can’t stop laughing. Your descriptions of the new Vogue fashion are spot on AND hilarious!! Love it

  17. Jen October 5, 2015 at 12:25 pm #

    These are awful. My guess would be this company is going into the circular file.

  18. Jess October 5, 2015 at 12:32 pm #

    Vogue 1468 errr placement of the red flower in the pattern? Not good!

  19. beakie48 October 5, 2015 at 12:46 pm #

    I agree completely! WTF with the last one! OMG my sides are hurting. I totally agree.

  20. blaupause7 October 5, 2015 at 12:47 pm #

    Oh. my goodness, my Guinness… The last one Looks indeed very awful

  21. Cynthia October 5, 2015 at 1:26 pm #

    ROTFLMAO……………………………………it could not have been said or narrated any better – thanks

  22. rachelkennison33 October 5, 2015 at 1:51 pm #

    Yas! I look forward so much to your Vogue new pattern posts. I’m less than inspired by the new offerings, sadly. It’s a mix of “meh” and oversized wierdness. I did buy 9157 though… cute details and I love the multi cup size patterns! Saves me having to do an FBA and they always fir great.

  23. steelyseamstress October 5, 2015 at 2:13 pm #

    Good job I didn’t discover that you’d posted this when I was at work. There’s only so much giggling my serious colleagues can take. Megan, just can’t get past the rather unfortunate pattern positioning now on V1468. And what is that Zandra Rhodes apparition, apparently the skirt can be “worn two-ways” according to the pattern information. How? As far as I was aware, skirts are worn around the waist, with fabric covering backside and legs? Anyway, quite agree with you Lauren about exposed zips. I’ve never seen why they get used everywhere. Nice pretty floral dress, slap an ugly back zip with metal teeth down the back – I really don’t get it!

    • jne4sl October 5, 2015 at 3:21 pm #

      It can be rotated 90 degrees so the yoke is on the tummy or the hips. Such possibilities, don’t know how I missed that in the photos! It requires purchased shoulder straps, suspenders must be great on bare skin.

      • steelyseamstress October 5, 2015 at 3:35 pm #

        Ha, now I get it! What styling possibilities – can’t wait to try that on all my skirts!

        • jne4sl October 5, 2015 at 6:28 pm #

          Yes, my thinking has been so uptight–I’m gonna let my skirts just spin where they will!

  24. niekemieke October 5, 2015 at 3:03 pm #

    Wait, what! No danglies? You disappoint me, Vogue!

    • LLADYBIRD October 9, 2015 at 8:12 am #

      I know!!! This might be the first time I haven’t seen danglies since, like… 2007!

  25. Becky October 5, 2015 at 6:36 pm #

    I can’t get over the butt-flaps picture/final scene from The Blair Witch Project. “Now go stand in the corner and think about what you just sewed!”

  26. Antipodean Stitcher October 5, 2015 at 6:42 pm #

    That last one! You can see the daggers being shot from the model’s eyes at having to wear such hideousness.

  27. Chris October 5, 2015 at 9:39 pm #

    I always get a kick out of your New Vogue Pattern posts…

    PS If you want to see some GORGEOUS clothes, check out:
    NETFLIX: “The Time In Between”

    I’m totally addicted.- Spanish dressmaker goes to Morocco with a BAD BOYFRIEND and he… (Well, you just have to watch it.)
    πŸ™‚ Chris

    here’s the Preview:

  28. Beezus October 5, 2015 at 11:31 pm #

    Um, that butt flap. So bad they made the model stand in the corner. And the 1468? Nice dress but the unfortunate placement of the flowers right there makes it look like she’s had a very unfortunate incident with her period. Slap that on the back and everyone would be pointing and whispering!

  29. Becky Thompson October 6, 2015 at 5:19 am #

    What a way to wake up on a Tuesday morning…spewing coffee out my nose! lol Thanks Lauren! I do like 9145 and would wear it to work but agree with the comment about ref stripes. Really? If not them, then what? A solid? Or maybe a tone-on-tone gray/black? That last skirt looks like the super baggy pants military folks brought back with them from the desert in the Iraq war. They called them 7-day shitters.

    • jne4sl October 6, 2015 at 7:20 am #

      McCall’s was nice enough to link to this dress which is a much better interpretation of the spiral cut. I also like that the striping is wide/narrow instead of uniform, but oh well.
      https://www.modaoperandi.com/thom-browne-pf14/seamed-spiral-cut-dress-in-rugby-stripe-silk-mogador_3

      • Becky Thompson October 7, 2015 at 5:19 am #

        The way that dress is designed, which I can see better in your link, is that for my pattern-size 18, I’d need a total of 6 yards of fabric (2 yds of each color) in order to get full length bias cuts for each piece from shoulder to opposite side hem. That’s a lot of fabric when I normally only need 2.5 yds. I’ll probably pass. Thanks!

        • jne4sl October 7, 2015 at 7:56 am #

          Yes that was my first thought, too. I like conceptual pieces like this but when actually calculating the fabric required I’m willing to leave them though experiments. Also, in the close ups of the Thom Browne it looks like pull along the piecing seams of the bodice has been very hard to control. Last thing I’d want is to go to all the trouble and have it look hackneyed.

          • Becky Thompson October 19, 2015 at 5:02 am #

            Hancock Fabrics had Vogue patterns for $4.99 last week so I picked up 9149 (the catalog shows another version street length without the tail). I had 9145 in my hands and truly considered it, but sadly it didn’t make it into the cart.

      • LLADYBIRD October 9, 2015 at 8:19 am #

        Oh god, that is beautiful. Now I understand why y’all don’t like the ref-stripes. This is SO much better!

  30. ellegeemakes October 6, 2015 at 9:08 am #

    Hilarious! Thanks for the grins….If I had somewhere to wear an evening gown, I might try the slinky gown. I wonder who buys those patterns, and what kind of life they lead (sigh). Glad there are some new designers there, but honestly, what’s with those boxes? Really?

  31. samalander October 7, 2015 at 1:59 am #

    So tired of exposed zippers. They’ve always looked to me like an attempt to make an accident look deliberate – like the dress was made just a little to small so they pulled out the invisible zipper and put in a huge metal one for the extra space and called it ‘avant-garde’, ‘bold’, and ‘a fresh take on XYZ’. bah πŸ™‚

    ❀ the stripey dress, and kinda like the big coat too – I like to keep my thighs warm on cold days πŸ™‚

  32. AJW October 7, 2015 at 12:23 pm #

    Your Vogue reviews never disappoint.

  33. Me October 7, 2015 at 11:07 pm #

    I don’t normally post, but I just have to tell you that I love you, you crazy girl. Xxx, A Grandma

    Sent from my iPad

    >

    • curvesmart October 9, 2015 at 12:18 am #

      If you want to know more about Nicola Finetti and what he might bring to the Vogue pattern line up (and god please let it be no more peplums) check out his link [http://www.nicolafinetti.com/2014/12/pre-fall-2015-2/] That dress you are all laughing about turns out to be his sample, not Vogue’s make!

      I find it very interesting of all the Oz designers, he is the one that has been signed up. I would have preferred to see something less tame from him – but it’s a decent start and ANYTHING (yes, even the Rhodes mess) is better than more Tilton shirts!!

      • LLADYBIRD October 9, 2015 at 8:18 am #

        Oh yeah, the designer patterns are always samples from the designers. That blew my mind when I found that out – all the questionable fabric choices and terrible fit is solely the fault of the designer, not the pattern company!

        I haven’t had a chance to look at Nicola Finetti, so thanks for posting the link!

    • LLADYBIRD October 9, 2015 at 8:16 am #

      Aw, thank you! I love you too! πŸ™‚

  34. Crafty Clyde (@craftyclyde) October 9, 2015 at 1:43 am #

    ‘Bitch, be cool’ just made me crack up laughing – brilliant πŸ™‚

  35. Rebecca October 12, 2015 at 4:19 am #

    Hahaha!

    I have to admit, I can’t not like the Zandra Rhodes pattern cos, like, it’s Zandra Rhodes. But I like that, the sequin dress AND the purple zebra coat. Some combination of these things would be epic. Truly.

  36. Elizabeth October 16, 2015 at 6:53 pm #

    You always make me laugh with these posts, I was really befuddled by those decorative boxes and yes, I noticed her name was Hiney too! πŸ™‚

  37. Becky October 19, 2015 at 8:08 am #

    I love the little snark in the morning. Too funny!

  38. klarisabet October 27, 2015 at 8:32 am #

    I stumbled on to this blog as I was googling Vogue 1474 to figure out if I had made the right decision when ordering it an hour ago. Thoroughly enjoyed your write-ups! And the comments. Thanks for the laughs Yes, some of these designs are just weeeeeiiiird.

  39. sewsincity October 31, 2015 at 5:36 pm #

    Hahahaha best “pattern descriptions” I’ve ever seen

  40. Nicki Kay April 18, 2016 at 8:18 pm #

    I am making V1469, without the piping…
    This article is hysterical, and spot on!

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