vogue released their winter line of sewing patterns today – pretty early, if you ask me, since most of us are just dipping our toes into fall weather clothes (it was 100* here in nashville last week!). normally, i loove vogue sewing patterns. i love the extra touches that are included to make your finished garment more “handmade” than “homemade,” like french seams and foundation corsets and fun things like that. i love that they make patterns based of major designer’s looks so you can rip them off and save yourself $1000 in the process. i love the smug satisfaction i get from sewing an ~advanced~ vogue pattern because it makes me feel smart and knowledgeable.
I DO NOT LOVE VOGUE’S NEW PATTERN LINE, THOUGH.
i hope you are not eating when you proceed.
ok, i lied. there were 3 patterns i actually liked (or semi-liked):
vogue 8701 is almost perfect, except those pants are horrible. the jacket is supa cute though. maybe when i finish my lady grey, i will be the tailoring queen and i will make one of those jackets for myself.
i like the line drawing on this. i have been digging the idea of wearing a sheath dress with a coat over it that has lining that matches the sheath dress (like so), and i also like the idea of the coat and dress being the same fabric with some kind of cute contrast for the lining.
and it gets worse…
kind of cute, but at the same time it doesn’t make a lick of sense. is that a… sleeveless jacket vest thing with a train at the back??? may i remind you that this is the WINTER line. wtf why would i wear a jacket with no sleeves in the winter? anyone? anyone?
this pattern also includes leggins. PROTIP: LEGGINS ARE NOT PANTS JSYK.
this is another vintage vogue… the line drawing is cute, in a stylized-40s-woman-with-an-impossibly-small-wasp-waist kind of way, but i can’t stop loling at the irl version that vogue made up. THAT WOMAN DOESN’T EVEN LOOK REAL.
keeping with the grand tradition of giving us useless patterns for turning squares of fabric into scarves (i guess scarves = winter clothing??), vogue offers not one, but TWO scarf patterns:
and who can forget the shriner-wannabe hats? made from fleece, of course. because nothing says professional millinery like some cheap $7.99 a yard purple fleece bought with a joann’s coupon.
of course, i saved the best for last…
vogue, i am disappoint.